Thank to become stronger
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As children we learn to thank salesgirl in a bakery when she gave us some candy. Passer, which returns us to the ball. Thank you for this, thank you for - all educated people say this without hesitation. However, the real appreciation is much greater effort. First of all, because it puts us in a weak position in relation to another. We recognize that the need of the other person dependent on him, and, therefore, recognize the fact that we are not self-sufficient and able to feel indebted to him. But thanks to our need for emotional balance. Expressing gratitude to the other, we will be a long time to feel satisfied and happy.
other Expressing gratitude, we shall continue to experience the satisfaction and joy
The philosopher Martin Buber called this meeting, "I - you" 1. Expressing gratitude, we leave ourselves and jump into the unknown meeting, overcoming their own limits. This revelation teaches us that what we do not know about themselves, because they were not sufficiently open meeting with him. "In order to move towards the other, one must know the starting point. You need to know yourself and be with them, "- wrote Martin Buber. Thanks - movement outside of himself towards the other, which ennobles and elevates us.
Three of our readers to share their stories of gratitude.
"I am grateful to the man who broke up with"
Dean, aged 27, journalist
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Once in my life, a man entered. Without asking permission, and he came out and decided: "I have here." And then, when I got used to it, he just left without saying goodbye without notice. I was left alone. Alone with an endless list of questions: "Why?", "What did I do wrong?", "What to do next?". Over time, questions have grown in charge: yourself, and everyone around him. Resentment inside grew and became strong, and I'm weakened. From the mirror looked at me sullen, resentful and embittered the whole world person. At some point I said to myself: "Enough! It's time to let go of the situation. " Easy to say, but how to do it, no one knows. I thought: let go - to forgive and remember only the good. They say that time heals all wounds, but I did not want to wait. I decided to immediately write on the items for which I would like to thank this man. The first "thank you" I gave literally from scratch - the lead on glossy paper. The second was easier with the third - even easier, and then the good memories came back, one by one, only have time to write. By the end of the list of months the pain was gone. I was myself again. And the one I loved, has ceased to be the offender, and was the best friend. I wanted to share these words with him. Not for him, but for themselves, so you do not regret the important words that I did not tell the man to make me happy, though at the time. I do not expect an answer. After thanking him, I allowed myself to go further, glad that this story has been in my life.
"It is a pity that I can not tell my grandfather" thank you "
Nikolay, 32 years old, operator, artist
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Grandfather never said leave me alone, you're in my way! I always spinning around him, so I was interested to see what it does. So I'm not too pestering him, he gave me some piece of wood: here's a drill, drill, drill! Grandfather with his vast experience of life could, it seems, everything. During the war he was zampoteh (Under the technical part -.. Ed.) Division, wrecked tanks repaired in the field. And after the war became an architect. For any job, whether it's big or small repair fix, it is suitable as a project. First, did the drawing, then it embodies. Many invented unusual, designed furniture. I am doing fantastic things out of the ordinary drawing paper. I once said to him: Grandpa, I want a tractor! He sits half a day (I do not know how he came up with this pattern) - and turns the tractor! Magic! I was 8 years old when my grandfather passed away. But he influenced me greatly. First of all, the fact that instilled a love of physical labor, has shown that a person must be "and creator, and the reaper." It gives me a sense of integrity, and a man's confidence. I do not depend on the mercy of electricians, plumbers and other strangers. I, like my grandfather, like this autonomy. I live in the apartment of his grandfather, where much has been done by his hands, and try to keep her spirit, something of himself to make furniture. It's so nice - to see the fruits of their labors. And my skills help me in the work. In general, head and my hands are in agreement, it is a pity that I can not tell my grandfather "thank you" for it.
"I thanked her schoolteacher"
Evdokia, 21 years old, a student of
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Recently, my school teacher Lev Iosifovich Sobolev was the anniversary, and its graduates have written to him all sorts of messages. I wrote that if he had not, I would not be in the world, because my parents met when he engaged: he was their coach. This is one. And the second - it is my destiny, is what it is now, there was because of him. He taught us to think, and this is probably the most important thing. He invited us to class known philologists and used to chat during the lecture started discussion with speakers. And we are invited to argue, not only with classmates but also with himself. He respectfully treat us, not condemn, we learn to express their thoughts without fear to say nonsense. And I was released, I emancipated our theater. Leo I. put us these performances: with imaginative rapping, with the competition for the role, with costumes, make-up, light. The opportunity to visit different images helped me to understand how life works, why we are doing so, and not otherwise.
Finally, thanks to my teacher, I chose the profession. My parents philologists, and the spirit of contradiction, I said that never philologist will not. And when in the 11th grade, we began to study the literature of the twentieth century and Leo I. he showed us the structure of the work, what meanings it carries my heart sank with delight. And I realized it was mine, I want to do it. My letter was short, but I said the main thing: "Thank you for having made me happy." 1 M. Buber "Two images of faith" (ACT 2014).