How to develop a sense of purpose
Feelings of emptiness and depression, boredom and lack of purpose ... It happens to us, unfortunately, in the most difficult times when we need self-discipline and determination.
We need self-discipline and determination, but even get out of bed in the morning can be difficult. Friends and relatives are not encouraging. And everything seems to be or not reachable or unnecessary. How can I change this?
Create a goal in life
Life changes completely if it has meaning and purpose.
The founder of psychoanalysis Sigmund Freud believed that our behavior depends on our sexual desires. Founder of existentialism Austrian psychotherapist Viktor Frankl proposed a different theory. He called his approach Logotherapy. Frankl considered the meaning of the most important driving force of our lives.
Frankl's experience was different than Freud's experience. In the 40s of the last century Frankl was a prisoner in a Nazi concentration camp. He had seen a lot of death and suffering around him. He felt the horror and lost relatives. Yet he survived. What helped him? What he found meaning in the struggle, and that gave him the strength to go through all the tests.
In his book, where he describes all the experiences he quoted Friedrich Nietzsche: "Man can make any" as "if he knows the" why "." Such is the power of purpose. The goal gives us the strength to endure trials, harsh living conditions, any difficulties.
The two goals of
Fortunately for us, we are not in a situation such as Frankl. Therefore, in the practical life we can distinguish two types of goals. Let us call them the first and second target level. The first - the initial, original. The second - more ambitious. first-level objectives: to know their values and act in accordance with it. When we know what we believe, what values stand for, and we do what we believe in, our self-esteem and confidence in yourself grow, no matter how difficult it is for us to the current situation.
second level goals - other. They do not relate to the current situation, and to a picture of life in general. This is our search for meaning, direction. It feels like we're on the right track. And it helps us to get up in the morning refreshed and full of energy.
to give, not to take the
We all want for ourselves the good life. But success and happiness as the goal of life contrary to common sense. "Do not call the success of its purpose, - says Viktor Frankl. - The harder you think his goal, the more likely you are to achieve it does not. Success, like happiness, can not be created by us, it happens by itself, it is an unplanned by-product of the fact that a person devoted to his cause or the other person more than yourself. "
We want to be loved? Let us love others! We want more money? Then we help others to make money! We want more joy and pleasure? Let's bring joy to others.
It sounds simple, but the more we give - especially if we do it with pleasure - the more fun gives us our own lives.
The three terms of "I"
Make three lists:
- to me
- My strengths of
- My desire to
Take the time and attention. Do not let the thoughts dissipate. After you finish the job, you will feel the direction in which you move.
Put it all in the service business, person, company or organization - something larger than yourself. Then your life will make sense, and you - the dedication.
The practical side of life
Only 10% of happiness comes to us from outside sources, such as money, fame, social status - says a positive psychologist Sonja Lubomirski in his book "The Psychology of Happiness."
Perhaps you are willing to sacrifice some amount of money in order to do the work that you like best.
Useful to you a simple financial formula: your income should be higher than your expenses. That's the whole secret. If you can reduce costs by giving up is not the most pressing needs (perhaps it's a car, cable television, some delicacies or a shopping trip for fun), you can spend the money on something that you are indispensable.
And if you think that in order to do this you have to change your lifestyle - perhaps a change of lifestyle is what you need to live a meaningful life.