How to love yourself first in the relationship, and then partner?
When a man loves himself, he meets a partner who loves him too, for an equal relationship.
When a person does not love himself, he is waiting for a partner who will love him, care for him, to give him gifts or tasty to feed him, in every possible way to provide tokens, take care of it, to solve his situation. Then there will be plugging it inside the hole, it will mask the problem :)
And for some reason it turns out that his problem is not solved, but only grow and are exacerbated.
Man is becoming worse and worse.
And he continues "to love" and hope for reciprocity, understanding and honesty.
Partner loves himself (in his own way, of course, he also has a lot of problems), does what he wants, comes when he wants, does not come when you do not want. I have plans, agreements, desires, rude, insults ... And, perhaps, the very surprised how much there is patience in the one who waited, hoped and believed. And he continues unconsciously educate and teach him life.
The man who loves himself will not tolerate such a relationship for a long time.
He just finished them. And goes on. And suffer too will not be very long, so ... mourn a little.
A man who himself does not love, does not respect, do not appreciate - will continue to forgive, to sort things out, to wait, to persuade, to cry into my pillow, will try to be strong and good will blame himself for all this and think that this is it something wrong does, and how to change it so himself, that he realized that very fact, he loves it, just do not understand yet. And here I am, a good change - and he will understand, and we will be all right ... And every time the situation intensifies. Hoaxes are increasingly, parting all the longer explanations more ...
Nothing changes. Why?
Because you love for yourself is not added.
He could not shut all your holes to lack, loneliness, abandonment, fear, humiliation, anguish.
He will already shown so much, and you do not see yourself.
But where to look, what actually ???
Again in itself. What do you feel?
You all decide his problems, and he has no problem, he's fine, he does not think about you, live their lives.
And what do you doing?
Them. Only to them. And what's going on inside, you do not care. And feelings have overflowed.
So, sit back and look at my pain. We do not try something to do with it. Very often want to get rid of it, it would be desirable that it was not and it was all good. Will not work until you accept the fact that nothing is good, that is a very bad, so bad that there's nowhere to run. So we look at this feeling. This is something that currently requires your attention - and this is something that you can afford to give, and so you can cure yourself. From dislike for themselves, depending on the partner.
Just watch the body.
Thoughts see and let go, let the feelings flow. We do not go for them, just look the part.
More reflections. Maybe it will be clearer.
Look at his attitude to a partner.
- When you love (you think) - you want to spend time with your partner?
- You call back when promised?
- You apologize if could not arrive when promised, and try as far as possible not to let the person?
And why did you allow to do so with you your partner ??? And regularly.
Or even better way:
- Your partner wants to spend time with you (not only speaks, but it carries)?
- He apologized for the absence of many days, even though he promised to come, and not to do - or do regularly?
- He keeps his promises?
- He promises call for lunch and does not call a few days?
- Are you feeling well without him?
Do you still say that the truth of his love ???
Well, then do not be offended that you are playing with only one goal. And continue to wear rose-colored glasses.
But not surprising. If you do not love yourself, why someone should love you? Why do you expect from the other person better relationship, and ourselves is a good attitude can not give?
In fact your partner behaves, and you do not like not himself personally and his attitude towards you. You do not like the feeling that you are experiencing at the moment. And these feelings are telling you how it is you yourself do not accept and do not like. And here's what you do not want to know about yourself. And why do you accuse a partner in his suffering.
How to love yourself?
Take responsibility for your life and experience feelings. They are your draws and more. Understand what's stopping you love yourself - the best in the world. What thoughts swirling in your head about himself.
- This is really your thoughts?
- Or is it that you have done yours?
- And in fact it is - mothers words, grandmothers, fathers, teachers and ex-partners?
- How do you actually belong to him?
- Where are you ???
Hug yourself by the shoulders, tell me how much you love yourself. Only you can convince the inner child, that he was all right and he is loved. He does not believe it, but you. And you, he just could not believe it.
Learn to give attention and do not spend time to solve other people's problems, the expectations, the hopes.
To get love, it must pay first.
In order to give it to her to have.
You have this love. You are the - love itself. You just forgot. Remember this. You deserve the best !!!
More women turned to the article, but it is also applies to men.