5 ways to be happy in a complex relationship
The secret to strong and happy relationship - it's not goodbye and roses (although they do not hurt anyone else), and the ability to abandon conservative wisdom and to follow their own instincts. Couples who rely on time-tested, and examples from the relationship, rarely come to something differently. Their relationship gradually reduced to frustration rather than an optimal solution for the two of them. Relationships need to be dynamic, organic and reflect what is going on between the partners at the moment. We have written a few tips that will help to break the accepted rules and strengthen the bond with your lover.
1. Unconditional love does not exist
The purest love - a love without conditions, right? At least that's what we were told as a child, so teaches literature. But that's only in real life, unconditional love is rare. This is a beautiful fairy tale, which creates a very low standards of relations. Partner, must not think that any of his behavior, no matter how bad it hurts and your loved one will be forgiven and understood. Of course, relationships are tough times to be to survive and endure, but if both partners take each other for granted, they simply cease to respect the comfort zone, and its limit, that everyone has their own. In love, you need to set limits, as they help to see the warning signs: financial irresponsibility, emotional abuse, sexual ignorance or inaction. All this can hurt your relationship, and finally they will rot over time.
2. give more - more receiving
Everyone knows that in a relationship each has to carry his own load. But the relationship - it is not always 50 to 50. Someone's initiative can change the relationship as a whole. Despite the fact that the limits already placed, it is sometimes useful not ask for more, and give more. If your relationship is strong enough, then your desire to give greater partner is sure to be greeted with affection, though not immediately. 70% - it's not sacrifice, and your desire to show how you appreciate and love your partner, even if sometimes it does not do what you would like.
3. Selfishness in bed
Sexually satisfied couples know that they need for fun, especially his. Only after they get what they need, they can take care of your partner's pleasure. If both of you are doing everything to make you pleased that it will be easier to give pleasure to each other. Do not expect that your partner will do what you want, or that pleasure will come by itself - make excellent happen here and now.
4. Do not pause
Pause - an alternative to the parting, which was popular in high school years, when you and your partner had no life experience, no responsibility, nor the desire to solve problems. This is normal. But in a serious relationship break - it's just an attempt to delay the decision. You may find that while you're in the break, everything is gradually improving, you let go of negative emotions and, returning to the relationship, you may feel that things are really getting better. But this does not mean that everything has changed. To spend the night away from home, from their parents, just to cool down - it is one thing, but to live your life, not knowing how now lives your partner - it is an indication that your relationship is cracking at the seams, and you can not save them, if you do not change nothing.
5. "The one" - is a myth
Fantasies, if you choose to partner, or it does not suit you - it is meaningless time spent. Everything they say that if you are with the right person, then you only joy and happiness are waiting for, and stress - the first indication that something is wrong. But in reality, this belief only harm relations. If you want your partner to change, modify themselves.
Be a model of what you want to see the person next to him. Do not like that your partner is late all the time, do not wash the dishes or manifests selfishness - sure, not whether you do the same. Of course, if you already live in this belief and take care of yourself before you demand something from your partner, but still encounter problems, you should re-read the paragraph number 1 again. The rest is invested in the relationship what you want them to be.