Blog on the table!
Do you think that a diary of observations is required only in elementary school, to draw him snowflakes and wisely enter temperature in Celsius?
self-observation method in cognitive-behavioral therapy can differentiate their condition teaches monitor thoughts and realize the causes of negative emotions.
Let's start with examples from practice.
"My husband drives me. I understand that she "vedus" its provocations. Hang on, try not to react, but in a moment suddenly - bam - and all raced! Pluck, I issued to him by all the full program. Then a few days to recover. I feel myself absolutely shattered, some empty, and - the losing, that is. How do you stop yourself to keep from irrational behavior, wanton spraying of emotions "?
Ekaterina, 38 years old.
"I feel a constant anxiety. In all situations. When should I call the clinic and ask what time the doctor takes when you have to shout in his bus stop when you need to contact the seller with a request to change the leaky package of cookies. I'm tired of constant fear. Can I change? "
Kseniya, 19 years old.
In these and in all other situations where your behavior upsets you, and depressing, try to sort out his thoughts using the diary of observations. Get yourself a notebook, armed with a pen, pencil and ruler. All the other attributes required for the job, are you in the head. Draw a table from 3-4 columns.
- of events.
- The thoughts arising in me.
- Emotions (if you can as a percentage).
- Alternative thoughts (this count "with an asterisk" to "advanced" with the experience of users).
Fill in the following table need each day, entering and analyzing the events that caused you stress.
How do I determine the percentage of the emotions? Think of a situation in which an emotion (eg, injury) was the most severe. That's it and compare its current "passions". However, even without percentages diary works. You will become easier to recognize the situation and observe your emotions as though from a distance.
Here is an entry from the diary of a real one another client.
February 17 had a fight with my mother. She said that I was doing wrong and do not like the child.
Thoughts incurred by me:
You will never understand me. I always you have bad.
Emotions that have emerged:
Insult - 40% Bitterness - 20%, anger - 30%
I love my baby. No one can force me to doubt it. Older people sometimes think they know how to live, because they have more experience.
Now, actually, the stage of "debriefing" begins. For the analysis of emotions is useful to ask yourself a few questions. Here is exemplary of possible questions and answers.
- Are there any evidence to the contrary? "We have an excellent relationship with the child", "I take care of it", "it helps me", "I always think about what I'm doing."
- If the worst happens, and this proves true, it will look like in your opinion?
"I'm constantly yelling at the child," "he will wander through the streets nobody wanted", "grow or not as" as expected ", some marginalized."
- Can you survive this?
"If the mother is still loving, most of all," I can ")
- What good is giving me this idea? Try to still find some positive in it grains. Or ask your question a little bit differently.
- Why do I think this?
"It makes you wonder about my insecurities and personal boundaries."
- What robs me of that idea?
"Peace", "confident", "peace of mind".
Expanding your emotions in such a way on the shelves, sorting on the "+" and "-", you will notice that the power of emotions has decreased significantly. You can return to the situation and talk about it calmly, as a dispassionate researcher.
The emergence of the new events, such as this, it is unlikely you will plunge back into the depths of emotion, at least (I hope so), you will have time to bring along your diary.