Safety introspection, or how not to get caught up in your own thoughts?

And this is understandable. Numerous studies have shown that people often feel control over their lives, demonstrate the constant personal growth, they are more calm and peaceful. However, we must understand that digging in itself does not necessarily correlate with the knowledge of himself. Often, the effect may be the opposite: the more we think, the less we know ourselves.

When we refleksiruem, "samoanaliziruem", we can try to understand our feelings ( "Why am I upset after this meeting"), challenge our value system ( "I really believe in what I think, I believe?"), Try calculate our future ( "what kind of work would make me really happy?"), or try to explain some of our negative patterns of behavior ( "Why am I torturing myself for the little mistakes?").

The problem with self-analysis is not that it is not effective, and that we are not always right. When we study the causes of our thoughts, feelings and behavior, we often ask ourselves the question "why". And we are looking for a simple reflex and a resounding answer to this question. One, perhaps two answers. And we cease to look reassured. That is, unconsciously, we tend to seek confirmation of our existing system of right and wrong. Through the question "Why" is the risk of getting bogged down in the past, while the question of "what" allows us to model a better future.

Therefore, when it comes to the development of internal self-knowledge, I would recommend to focus on "what" rather than "why". The issue is that shows our potential, supports curiosity. The question "what" - of the future. The question "that" helps us to better understand and manage our emotions. For example, you are in a bad mood after the working day. The question "Why" is likely to cause a flurry of useless responses like "because I hate Mondays," "because I am a negative person." If you ask yourself, "What am I feeling right now," you realize that you are overwhelmed by the amount of work, tired and just hungry. With this knowledge, you can make a dinner, call a loved one, or go to bed early. The question "What" and causes us to name our emotions. Translating our emotions into the language (written or oral) instructs our brains - "everything is under control."

Safety introspection, or how not to get caught up in your own thoughts?

Perhaps the rule of using the "what" or "why" in the self-analysis can be formulated in such a way. When I need to better understand the events in the external environment (work, relationships, and so on. D.), I ask myself "why". When I need to understand myself, I ask myself the question "what". It is also logical sequence: the question "What do I feel" is always preceded by the question "why I feel."

If you feel at some point that were at an impasse, it is best to consult a good specialist. Please treat yourself carefully, and give yourself the opportunity to enjoy the moment sometimes and just live.