How to live: why should we Reborn dolls?
reborn doll is different from a live baby is only one - the absolute stillness. She was not moving, was not breathing and did not blink, but the rest - in the weight, height, skin smoothness, shine eye - indistinguishable from a real baby. These dolls invented for children - just as another entertaining toys to entertain kids. However, as it turned out, for this purpose reborn completely inappropriate.
"Kids do not like such toys, - says psychotherapist Barbara Sidorova. - With them, it's impossible to play: to make the right amount of action and manipulation, to dream, invent. Naturalism and the similarity with the living child most attracted the attention of adults. "
Reborn with their exaggerated naturalism, so like a living, but it is strange and scary stationary baby, many frightened and cause a desire to turn away. But there are people - and they are many - who appreciate Reborn is for limiting similarity with newborns and are willing to pay for a doll a lot of money. "People buy them in an effort to satisfy their desires. Some want to nurse the baby and take care of it, but they are hesitant for whatever reason in the living baby, and others are themselves in need of warmth and caring - and make a doll that would like to do with them: Kuta, lull, swing on pens, nursing ... "- says Barbara Sidorova.
Security and predictability
Women enjoy playing with Reborn, dressed up in their beautiful clothes, the food, lull and ride in a wheelchair. They love these "children", who - oh, miracle! - do not cry and do not make up at night ... get a comfortable, pleasant and safest way to stay near the mother. "It's really very attractive, - says Barbara Sidorova. - With the doll can play and put it away in a drawer. A living children need attention, responsibility, absorb resources, time and effort. Moreover, children - it is forever. A Reborn never grow up, do not change, will not leave her mistress. All safe and predictable. They will not say hurtful words, do not cause pain. For them not to be afraid, there is nothing to expect from them. And in any situation you can not feel like a bad mother. "
On the other hand, why then women do not play with other dolls, too nice and naturalistic, but with babies? "In every game there is an imitation of life and exercise of certain experiences - meets Barbara Sidorova. - Playing with Reborn, newborn, woman gets in a homeopathic dose of all that it would have received from this baby. She may be happy to afford to stay tender and caring. In addition, the baby - is a touching tenderness, vulnerability, bows, kruzhavchiki, beauty ... Therefore, the baby care always causes positive emotions - affection, admiration. Getting these experiences in micro-doses of a woman fills some internal deficiency. " The surroundings of this game and the opportunity to create also has its charm. A woman can create different babies with different characters, coming up to them and the fate of the family. This activity becomes something like writing stories or fairy tales are only used when it is not the word, and material objects.
Reborn could get and a woman who has not yet become a mother, but a lot of thinking about it and "trying on" the future of motherhood. Playing, she will learn the skills of practical care and get used to the role of mother. By the way, as a "simulator" Reborn used in groups of pregnant preparation for the birth of a baby.
More than a game?
And what if the game will be delayed? "In such a game need people with emotional deficits that can be replenished, taking care of the doll - explains Barbara Sidorova. - When it comes Reborn, the more often it is a deficit of care, affection, security, Tenderness admiration. Sometimes it is the need to respect and a recognition of the importance as a caring mother. "
In this case, the reborn can reduce the pressure of unfulfilled needs, but can not satisfy her completely. It is very often talking about people who have experienced trauma in a relationship, often in early childhood, and for some reason, this injury was not healed. "Dolls in this case," anesthetize "deep despair, as usual, the man himself it is no longer noticed. Just feels after playing with the doll becomes a better, more pleasant ", - says the therapist. That is why the demand of man that he immediately stopped playing with artificial baby-reborn is simply cruel. How to select a drug in a patient - or chalk a person who lacks calcium. Us it is shocking to us strange and embarrassing to watch this desperate attempt to make up for the shortage, but the person gets relief from this. "Even if a person does not realize the depth of what was happening to him, he can not be deprived of the opportunity to play. From this it will be just miserable - the therapist said. - Better not canceling "analgesic", refer to a specialist, in order to truly heal the emotional wound that remained inflamed and sore. "
Imagine a woman who rolls the stroller in the park with your child. After all, she also asserts itself as the mother-child relationship is reaping the fruits of her as a mother, and in this it has a necessity. What if she can get all the same, but in a different form? Most likely, over time, will be held passion reborn, and the woman goes into a different category - storyteller or expectant mother, ready for a new phase of life.