5 ideas to raise children optimists

5 ideas to raise children optimists

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Many children are afraid of the adult world. Communicating with psychologists on various occasions, they talk about the feeling of helplessness and self-doubt. And their parents are covered by anxiety for the future of their children in our society in crisis. But our experts are sure that today it is the optimism could be the basis of education. "We are talking about a person's ability, despite the difficulties and uncertainties, understand the value of life itself," - says child psychologist Galia Nigmetzhanova. A psychoanalyst Alain Bracon (Alain Braconnier) recalls that today love and authority of children is not enough. We have to maintain their zest for life, their desire to grow, their hope.

To transfer the child an optimistic outlook can only close person lives. Does that - loving? Not necessarily, says child psychologist. "This is someone who is willing to accept the child, not an example to his schemes, patterns that can peer at him, genuinely surprised at him," what are you "Whoever he appreciates life and can therefore transmit this feeling baby!". Based on data from positive psychology, Alain Bracon argues that parents pessimists might well raise a child-optimist. Provided that they understand how their pessimism hinders them and want to protect the child from their own limitations. The analyst also stressed that optimism helps anxious and vulnerable children regain a taste for life and hope. Five educational principles proposed by our experts, require the parents of perseverance and consistency, but these efforts can change the lives of children, to give them back the confidence, the ability to smile and not be afraid of the future.

1. Encourage his curiosity

A small child craves discoveries. Everything he touches, that tries that sniffing, gives him the desire to venture to get out of a familiar environment. And our task - to give him the freedom to experiment. "Keep his curiosity and inquisitiveness - emphasizes Galia Nigmetzhanova. - Keep an eye to what he was doing, trying to understand what motivates them, and get involved in his studies. " Otherwise, left to itself in the face of puzzles, which he can not afford to allow the child gradually lose interest and begin to doubt yourself. Share admire us open, to explain, to answer his questions, attach it to the new books, exhibitions, travel - all of which can create a child's sense that life prepares him a lot of pleasure to come. This is enough to be happy to seek in the future.

2. Do not dramatize his mistakes

Discovering the world, the child will also explore their own boundaries. When too many failures, he feels anything not fit and drops his hands at the slightest difficulty. "Therefore, it is important to understand adults fears (often with unfounded) that we transmit to children unwittingly" - warns Alain Bracon. It is worth considering: how I treat myself with my mistakes? Does a son or daughter to understand that a mistake - it is an opportunity to learn something? "Measure not the child, and what he did, - says Galia Nigmetzhanova. - shares his diligence, effort (keep them) and a bad result. " If we trust in the child, we are able to be with him, not doing, however, the problem instead, allow yourself to look for a solution, we appreciate its successes, we thereby increase its resistance and hope to succeed in different endeavors.

5 ideas to raise children optimists

Martin Seligman "How to learn optimism" Optimism can be learned. Skills of positive attitude towards life and self-respect it is possible to master. One of the founders of positive psychology tells how.

3. To help him to think precisely and

One of the pillars of positive psychology, Martin Seligman became interested in what can help the child to control the situation actively, rather than passively endure it. He found that two features are characteristic of the pessimistic installation: the failure to take into the account ( "With me there was something wrong, because I am bad") and compile ( "It's always"). Both settings result in a feeling of helplessness. "There is no way to not receive anything at all. Therefore, when a child fails, it is better as closely as possible to explain to him what happened, what it was he did not have "- says Galia Nigmetzhanova. Then the decision will be for him more and more obvious, and those that are available to him and did not depend on the doom.

4. instilled in him a taste for the efforts of

The child will need a lot of energy to win his place in life, to carry out what would make him happy. To do this, he must as soon as possible to feel that the effort paid off: give him new skills or improve his life. So do not criticize your child for what he is not able to do, and to compare it with the other children, who it turns out. When the front of the child task that seems impossible to him, remind him of the success that he has achieved through their efforts (I learned to walk, read, swim). "Help him to notice and appreciate the good points - the Council Galia Nigmetzhanova. - They will protect him in times of difficulty that inevitably will. " Why not make such a ritual before going to bed together to remember those moments where he was able to surpass himself, where his efforts were rewarded, something he can be proud of, taught him thus focus on the good.

5. Develop confidence in the world

Some children pessimists avoid contact, others choose a friend who feels even more uncertain. "The way a child looks at himself and the world, is too dependent on other people who are able to enrich his view of the world, or impoverish it" - emphasizes Alain Bracon. "Therefore, developing in children the confidence to the world, to people - continues Galia Nigmetzhanova - we teach them to open up to others, turn to them for help, to build on it." When a child enters into a relationship with different people (one of them his soothe, stimulate others), he knows that he can count on the other, and feels more secure. We will help him to know the world, interested in his friends, developing his empathy, showing how great friendship value.